Shoes, Books & Cynicism
Kate Stone Matheson
The Wax That Melts Our Wings

I’d say it’s what separates us, not from the beasts, but the bestial. Creating the future, renewing a learned past - these are reasons to strive. Writing for and with love, taking and framing an image, stretching new melodic skins onto old skeletons of song… it’s how we manage to fly. It’s how we stay you and me, not us and them.

The Wax That Melts Our Wings
Shoes, Books & Cynicism
Kate Stone Matheson
The Lady Jellypants Guide to Grace and Poise

Unlike Osk, who seemed to establish his own tactical task force wherever we lived, scooping up neighbourhood feline troublemakers as sidekicks (including the memorable ginger behemoth Watson, with whom he used to scope the street from the safety of the shed roof), Jelly has the intelligence gathering skills of a sponge cake.

The Lady Jellypants Guide to Grace and Poise
Shoes, Books & Cynicism
Kate Stone Matheson
Love Me Tender

Anyway, somewhere in between my 'and then you should've done this' and 'why didn't you say x and y, rather than z', and 'for the love of monkeys and the general public's eyesight, you didn't honestly wear that heinous shirt did you', something he was saying about the dating extravaganza we were picking to pieces finally penetrated my cloud of self-congratulatory cumulo-waffle. 

"Most people don't talk about how dates are progressing as a tender process, do they?" he asked. 

"What?"

"She said I was 'part way through the tender process' and that she was judging me on my submission. I'd like to think there was irony involved, and I think at the time I may have given an admittedly weak "haha, yesssss, quite". Looking back, I'd have to conclude, computer says no on the presence of Fabulon or other aids to achieving crisply pressed linen."

Love Me Tender

hitchhikers guide to the galaxy

Beam Me Up, Scotty

““There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
than are dreamt of in your philosophy.””

— William Shakespeare, Hamlet

Today is World UFO Day. I wasn't aware of this until earlier this morning, when I was reliably informed by the Panda in our daily phone idiocy that yes, July 2 is an extraterrestrial event, with close encounters of all kinds a longed for possibility. 

This got me thinking about what is out there - if anything. And if there is something or someone cruising through the galaxies, it begs the question: 

Why would they come anywhere near us? 

I love Dr Who, although the Daleks scared me silly as a kid. What I never can understand though is this; despite having a whole universe to play with, he spends all of his time footling around on Planet Earth. Think about it - there are skies and skies to choose from, and yet he is bumming around watching a fairly ordinary race try to self-destruct on a daily basis.  

Personally, I'd be off on the equivalent of Planet Las Vegas getting my Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster on. 

I think that the reason we've never (officially) had confirmation of other life forms out there is because they have taken one look at the mess we have made and said 'thanks, but no thanks' - or however you say it in Venutian - or as the case may be, Martian (by the way, if men are from Mars and women are from Venus, how did we end up here together?). 

Don't get me wrong; I would love to know that there's life out there, even if it's not as we know it. But I really do think that if there are higher beings, then they would think 'what the hell?' and do as the Vogons did and bulldoze the Earth for an efficient transportation system.  

Perhaps I am being too harsh. Perhaps this is just Tuesday morning cynicism, and in an hour or so when I have had more coffee I will be in love with the human race as a whole once more.  

Either that or I will keep watching last night's Q&A and decide to crawl back under the doona until politicians don't exist. 

Now there's a thought. Aliens with enormous weapons of which we have no knowledge - we welcome you to our world; on one condition - when you leave... 

Take out the rubbish. 

Or should that be Ruddish? 

And I am off to drool over David Tennant (as usual) and imagine him taking me away from all this...